(An earlier draft of this comment appeared in my blog on Tuesday, 11 March 2008.)

It seems to me that often, when I've felt torn and hesitant about expressing appreciation, without being fully aware of it, I've felt vulnerable because I'd confused the expression of appreciation with the expression of praise.

To me, every bit as much as condemnation, praise remains a form of comparative, moralistic judgment.

As I interpret them, both typically imply a hierarchical relationship, and both remain part of the domination matrix of concepts.

If I morally condemn someone, I moralistically declare myself superior to the other. If I express praise of another, I put that other on a pedestal, declare that other superior, and often imply that I'm inferior.

So I've found it helpful to omit praise from my expression of appreciation. Then I can express my gratitude without implying that either person is inferior.